Address the underlying causes of addiction. 

I'm sure you've heard people say, "you have to deal with the underlying causes of addiction if you want to recover." A lot of us think this means we need to uncover childhood trauma or unresolved grief.  

So you go to counseling and wait for your Good Will Hunting moment. You know, the moment where Sean McGuire (played by Robin Williams) hugs Will Hunting (played by Matt Damon) and refuses to let him go.  The tears are flowing and Robin Williams keeps repeating "It's not your fault" over and over again with increasing drama and catharsis.  

Damn, I love that movie! In fact, I've seen it at least five times, and that scene makes me cry every time!

Obviously, Will is cured after that, so he goes after his girl and rides off into the sunset to live his happily-ever-after! 

Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way in real life! 

Sure, it's nice to have one of those deeply cathartic moments.  It can even feel like a weight has been lifted off our shoulders. But, in real life Will, would still be plagued by the hard-core defense mechanisms he'd built up over the years, as a result of the abuse he suffered.

He would have continued to struggle with trust and vulnerability, and those issues would undoubtedly push away the people he loved most. And my guess is that his drinking would have continued to escalate into full-blown alcoholism, making the situation even worse. 

Like Will, we all have defense mechanism patterns that cause us to continuously self-sabotage. 

Even when we understand why we have problematic coping skills, they won't just go away.  By the time, we reach adulthood, those patterns are hard-wired into us.  

The Good News For You Is...

You don't have to spend years in therapy trying to uncover every bad thing that ever happened to you! 

Our online mini-course, RecoverU,  uses the Enneagram Personality typing system to help you quickly identify problematic patterns and shows you how to maximize your strengths to overcome your challenges. So, you can get out there and live your BEST LIFE! 

How do you know what your self-sabotaging patterns are? Better yet, how do you stop the cycle? 

You can spend years in therapy trying to figure this out, or you can fast-track the process.  

In our office, we use a system called the Enneagram. The Enneagram is a personality typing system that describes patterns in how people interpret the world and manage their emotions.

There are 9 personality types, and they all interconnect.  We use this system because it uncovers a person's core motivations and fears. You can imagine how useful this is if you're trying to rid yourself of sabotaging behaviors. 

For example, if Will Hunting had participated in the RecoverU program, he would have learned that he was an Enneagram type 6.  Type 6's are often referred to as Loyal Skeptics.

Will would have learned that his basic fear is being without support and guidance.  He would know that what he craved most were security and support.  Ultimately, Will would have learned that his fear of not having support was causing him to avoid being vulnerable at all costs, thereby ensuring that he would never have to rely on another person. Thus keeping him from ever getting what he truly wanted and needed most.

Being aware of this pattern, wouldn't necessarily fix it.  However, it does bring subconscious feelings into conscious thinking, allowing us to make a strategic decision on how to respond to his triggers instead of impulsively reacting. 

After overcoming his fear of vulnerability, Will would have been able to more effectively get his emotional needs met.  He would no longer have needed alcohol to make him feel better. Which would have freed him up to share his genius with the world! 

Now that's a realistic path to finding your happily-ever-after!