Abusing drugs and alcohol keep you stuck in a victim mentality. I'm going to give you the four reasons why that happens.
This is one of those uncomfortable truth kinds of moments. When you're overusing drugs and alcohol, it most certainly keeps you stuck in a victim mentality. You get stuck on past hurts, you get stuck on things going wrong in your relationship, and you don't get over lost dreams and hopes and disappointments. You stay stuck in financial worries, and there are several reasons for this.
#1 reason why addiction keeps us stuck in victim thinking
The first and one of the biggest reasons this keeps you stuck is because when we use substances, it causes us to ruminate over all the bad things that have ever happened to us.
We replay it over in our heads, and as we do that, those hurts get bigger. It's kind of like when a piece of gossip starts. The first time you tell it, it's dramatic enough, but by the 10th time you tell it, the whole story is even more outrageous. The same thing happens when we ruminate over things that we're upset about in life. Those things tend to grow and snowball.
#2 reason addiction keeps you stuck in victim thinking
The second reason why abusing drugs and alcohol will keep you stuck in a victim mentality is the Rebound Effect. After you've engaged in addictive behavior or substance, your body rebounds back from that by producing more crappy brain chemicals. You know, the anxious depressed kind of brain chemicals. You can even have physical withdrawal symptoms. When we feel terrible, we think negatively, and using substances or engaging in addictive behavior keeps us in that never-ending loop.
#3 reason addiction keeps us in a victim mindset
The third reason that addictive behaviors keep us stuck in a victim mentality is that typically it causes the people around us to get frustrated with us. We're not ourselves, we're not keeping our promises and doing what we said we were going to do, and we're doing some risky behaviors. When the people around us get upset, they start venting to us, nagging us, preaching, threatening, and giving ultimatums.
And that makes us feel defensive, and then we get caught up in defending our actions. Now we're digging into that victim mentality and holding on for dear life once we get to this point.
#4 reason addiction keeps us stuck in a victim mindset
The fourth and most important reason why addictive behavior and substance abuse keeps us stuck in a victim mentality, is that it gives us an excuse to make more bad choices.
We're stuck in this addictive cycle, and whether we like to admit it or not, we have a strong compulsion to engage in certain particular behaviors. That means we have to go against our value system to continue with the addiction. We have to justify in our heads why we're doing this. We know it probably isn't right and we're making a terrible decision at minimum, and it may even be hurtful to other people.
We tell ourselves the storyline of, "I had to because they deserved it or because I deserve it." Some version of "I had to because or couldn't help it because..."
If you're stuck in this kind of mentality and ready to get out of your way, consider signing up for our Recovery ToGo online support group. We'll help you get out of this terrible cycle.
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