Growing up in an addicted home is confusing, frustrating, and scary for obvious reasons, but it's essential to keep in mind that everybody's experience is slightly different. Even kids who grow up in the same addicted home have a different experience.
Some kids growing up in an addicted home may see the addicted parent as the fun parent. Maybe the parent is happy or silly while intoxicated, and the parent might even let the kid get by with a lot more. When this happens, it can put the other parent in a bad guy position.
Many kids growing up in addicted homes experience a lot of gaslighting where one or both parents try to cover for the addictive behavior by convincing the kid that what they think is happening isn't happening, or that it's not that bad, or that it's normal. Kids growing up in addicted homes often feel guilty. A big reason for this is the adults in the home walk on eggshells to try to keep the peace with the addicted...
(The Invisible Intervention, Rapid Relationship Repair, Recovery ToGo, RecoverU, Motivational Masterclass)