Should You Go to Couples Therapy? The Truth No One Talks About

Pretty much anytime someone has a relationship problem, the advice is always the same.

"You should go to therapy."

It doesn't matter who you ask.

Your mom.

Your best friend.

Your coworker.

The internet.

Everybody seems to agree that's the obvious next step.

So it might surprise you to hear me say this, especially as a therapist who's spent more than 20 years helping people work through relationship problems:

Couples therapy isn't always the best place to start.

Now before you panic and think I'm anti-therapy, let me stop you right there.

I'm not saying therapy is bad.

I'm saying there are some blind spots that almost nobody talks about. And if you don't understand those blind spots, you can spend months—or even years—doing everything you think you're supposed to do while the relationship stays exactly where it is.

Sometimes it even gets worse.

Let's talk about why.

Why Couples Counseling Doesn't Always ...