Cracking the Code: A Real Talk Guide to Helping Your Loved One Overcome Addiction

Today's post is a deep dive into a topic that hits close to home for many of us: helping someone we care about overcome addiction. I recently discussed this on my YouTube channel, emphasizing the importance of not just knowing the steps to get sober but understanding how to get someone to want to take those steps. It's not about being a counselor; it's about being a genuine support system. Let's break down the key insights.

Step 1: Ditch the Bad Guy Role
The first challenge is stepping out of the "bad guy" role. When dealing with someone struggling with addiction, it's common to feel the urge to come down hard on them. But the magic happens when you align with them unexpectedly. Don't play into the expected anger; instead, be on their side. Acknowledge the unfairness of their situation because, well, it's true.

Step 2: Become the Trusted Advisor
Next up is earning the role of the trusted advisor. It's...

Navigating Sobriety During the Holidays
If you're here, you or someone you care about is likely navigating the challenging terrain of sobriety, especially during the holiday season. I'm here to provide some insights and strategies to help you stay on track during this potentially tricky time.

The Holiday Challenge: Staying Sober Amidst the Festivities

Holidays, though joyous, can pose a significant challenge for those on the path to recovery. The festivities often involve disruptions to our regular schedules, increased social gatherings, and a general shift towards a 'vacation mode.' In a recent video on relapse prevention, I discussed the importance of keeping the gate closed to vulnerability, a crucial aspect of maintaining sobriety.

Identifying Triggers: Three Categories

1. **Vacation Mode and Substance Use Escalation:**
The most obvious trigger during the holidays is the widespread shift to vacation mode. People tend to indulge more in substances, making it a potential stumbling...

The Three Components of Addiction: A Deep Dive into the Brain's Role

Understanding addiction involves more than just knowing about the role of dopamine in the brain. In this blog post, we'll explore how three crucial components come together to create a comprehensive understanding of addictive thinking and behavior. From the desire-inducing power of dopamine to the rebound effect and the compromise of judgment, each component plays a pivotal role in the intricate web of addiction.

1. Dopamine: The Desire Chemical Dopamine is often misunderstood as the "feel good" chemical, but its true role is the ignition of desire. When released in the brain, dopamine motivates and fuels the craving for something. The catch? Dopamine tricks you into thinking that achieving your goal will bring the anticipated satisfaction. However, this feeling is often short-lived, leading to a perpetual cycle of wanting and pursuing.

Example: The excitement of acquiring a new possession fades quickly, leaving...

Navigating an Alcoholic Marriage: Strategies for Survival and Recovery

Discovering your spouse's alcoholism can be overwhelming. In this blog, we explore practical tips to navigate this challenging situation, focusing on emotional well-being, financial preparedness, and maintaining a sense of normalcy.

1. Regaining Control of Your Emotions:

   • Emphasize the importance of taking charge of your emotions.
   • Break free from the cycle of fear and obsession by making calm, collected decisions.
   • Stop the constant checking, snooping, and questioning to regain emotional stability.

2. Financial Protections:

   • Acknowledge the possibility of an uncertain outcome and prepare accordingly.
   • Establish financial independence to ensure you can support yourself if needed.
   • Create a safety net by having a plan, whether a side hustle or support from friends.

3. Maintaining a Life Outside the Problem:

   • Reconnect with hobbies, interests, and social circles that don't revolve around the issue.
   • Prioritize self-care...

Navigating the Complexities of Addiction: A Deep Dive into Dr. Deloney's Advice

In a recent episode of the Dr. Deloney Show, the host tackled a deeply personal and challenging situation: a man struggling with alcohol addiction, which had led to the breakdown of his marriage. As we delve into the conversation, we witness Dr. Deloney's skillful navigation through the layers of addiction, offering insights, empathy, and practical advice.

The Beginning: A Story of Struggle

The caller begins by sharing his journey, highlighting key events such as an alcohol withdrawal seizure and the passing of his grandfather. Dr. Deloney keenly observes the conflicting messages – the acknowledgment of a severe drinking problem contrasted with the belief that legal troubles don't validate the severity of the issue.

Identifying Patterns: Unraveling the Cycle

As the caller recounts his attempts at recovery – from treatment in California to involvement in recovery programs with his wife...

What to Expect When You Quit Drinking: A Realistic Guide

We're diving into a topic that's close to my heart – quitting alcohol. If you've been contemplating giving up alcohol and are wondering what to expect, you're in the right place. It's a significant decision, and I want to give you a realistic perspective on this journey.

1. The Fear of Boredom:
One of the most common concerns people have when considering quitting alcohol is the fear that life will become boring and uneventful. After years of relying on alcohol to find joy and happiness, the prospect of living without it can be daunting. But here's the truth – quitting alcohol often leads to regaining the ability to experience genuine joy and pleasure. Alcohol may have been the very reason your life felt mundane in the first place.

2. The Fear of Missing Out:
Another common worry is the fear of missing out on social events and activities. While it's true that your interests and preferences might change, and you may...

Finding Motivation to Overcome Addiction: It's Not Always About Wanting to Change

You know how we often hear people say, "I decided to quit because I didn't want it anymore," or "I just decided to change." Well, let me tell you, that's not always how it goes down when it comes to overcoming addictive behaviors. As someone who has been on the front lines of this issue for a long time, I can confidently say that most individuals choose to change their addictive behavior not because they suddenly stop liking it but because they find themselves in a difficult situation. The consequences of not changing become greater than the consequences of changing. In this blog post, I'm going to delve into the nature of addiction and how you can motivate yourself to make a change, even when it feels like you're not ready.

Understanding Addiction:
Addiction is a complex beast. We're drawn to it because, at some point, it served a purpose in our lives. It offered something positive, even if...

The Power of Family in Helping an Alcoholic Loved One

The common narrative surrounding alcoholism is that nothing can be done to help an alcoholic until they decide to stop drinking. This belief is echoed by many treatment providers and centers, creating a sense of helplessness among family members. However, it's time to challenge this notion. As someone with 20 years of experience as an addiction counselor, I firmly believe that family members significantly influence their loved one's journey toward sobriety. In this blog post, we will explore why family members have such a crucial role and how they can effectively use their influence.

The Disconnect Between Treatment Providers and Families

In addiction treatment, a disconnect often exists between treatment providers and the families of those struggling with addiction. This divide can be attributed to several factors:

1. Overwhelming Pressure: Family members frequently inundate addiction treatment providers with phone calls...